10 Jobs That Make You Realize Your Job Isn’t That Bad

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• November 20, 2008
• By Vintage Brazen
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by Clay Collins

 

December is almost here, and with that marks another batch of fresh graduates rolling out of college, hunting for jobs. One might think once you get the degree it’s all fun and games from there on out. Sorry to burst your bubble, but at that point, the game has just begun.

Although a career choice can be quite hard to make at times, there are some that might make you think twice before you contemplate your options. After you see these jobs that some people are into, you will give yourself a pat in the back and know that you have made a wise choice when it comes to your career…of course, if you didn’t choose one the careers/jobs you are about to see.

1. Condom Tester

Hold your hormones before you start jumping up and down and telling us why this might be a fun job. Although testing condoms might sound like something fun, you have to think before choosing this as your career. Would you be willing to test condoms each day for durability, pleasure and what not? I doubt it. Of course it sounds fun and may be a little tempting to few fresh bloods out there, but testing condoms is actually more of an assembly-line, lab-coated gig, the same boring, repetitious run on a machine again and again. Oh, and next time you hear a commercial that says the condom has been “tried and tested,” know that someone really worked to bring that durable product to you.

2. Cemetery Telemarketer

That’s right! The phone rings, you look for it all over your house, and finally when you get to it, there is a call from India asking you to buy their vacation package. This is a typical scenario at my house, and I can almost bet that most of you have gone through this experience. Telemarketing calls for a vacation package sounds pretty annoying, right? Well, there’s something even worse. There are actually people who hold such jobs for cemeteries. Their job is to call (or, what we like to say, “tele-spam”) people and sell them a burial plot. Weird? No doubt.

3. Cheese Sprayer

Although the movie popcorn that you buy at theaters might be powdered cheese, its not the same when you buy packaged cheesy popcorn. These cheesy popcorn are hand-sprayed by people and they are called…you guess it…”cheese sprayers.” Cheese sprayers are the people who make sure each kernel is sprayed with cheese so as to tickle you taste buds and give you that cheesy pleasure.

4. Pathoecologist

The name sounds fancy and does need an extensive knowledge to be able to do it, but it still has to be one of the stinkiest jobs on earth. A pathoecologist is someone who analyzes feces from “the past” to draw conclusions on what people back in the day ate and derive facts from it. In other words, you can say this is a career for those who like to play with sh**. However, note that this, unlike other jobs, is a highly skilled job and needs quite a bit of educational background in the related field.

5. Odor Tester

This is considered one of the “stinkiest” jobs and has been talked about quite a few times. I am down for the money if the pay is good, but to make me smell someone’s armpit (and I am not sure what else you have to smell), the check would have to be quite hefty. Odor tester test body odor, which allows companies to find ways to inject chemicals in cans to keep that B.O. under control even when you come back home from a long day. If it wasn’t for these odor testers, “Tag” and others wouldn’t really be able to market their product the way they do. Next time you realize that new deodorant has been working quite well, take a minute and thank the guy who might have smelled hundreds of arm pits before providing their company with a possible solution.

6. Pet Food Tester

The next in line is the pet food tester. We have all tried to grab a handful as a kid from our pet’s food bowl ( probably the reason they can’t stop gnarling at us ), but we didn’t really get paid for the job. And, of course, it was mere curiosity. However, there are people that taste pet foods. If you think about it, most pets will almost eat or try anything, and the pet food industry can’t really get a clue from animals as to how the products turned out. That’s where pet food testers come into play. Next time you see a package that says “barbecue0flavored dog treats,” just know hat you don’t have to taste it to make sure, because someone else already did.

7. Chicken Sexer

Hold on before you start thinking something else. Chicken sexers are sort of like nurses in the maternity ward. When babies are born, someone’s gotta spill the beans and let everyone whether it’s a he or she. The same rule applies when it comes to chickens. They need to know if it’s going to lay eggs or be a cock. A chicken sexer is simple someone who lifts up baby chicks to see if they are male or female, and that’s what determines their fate, I guess.

8. Ant Catcher

I hate ants with a passion. I recently moved into a new apartment, and there were quite a few trees in the yard that came pretty close to the deck. Well, everything else looked pretty good besides the sight of ants all over my deck (and then crawling into my kitchen). I ended up chopping the trees myself, but imagine if I were an ant catcher. An ant catcher is a person who catches live ants that can be used in ant farms. Weird? Yes! Crazy? No doubt! Something I would like to earn a living? Of course not.

9. Egg Breaker

This has to be one of the weirdest, most unusual and unwanted jobs. This is one of those jobs that you probably don’t go for unless you have no way out. An egg breaker’s job is to separate yolks from whites. Personally, I find it hard to even crack open an egg without getting some shells in; separating yolks and whites might be a little harder than it seems. Imagine doing it day in and day out. And how about when someone asks “What do you do for living?” Not fun.

10. Zoo Artificial Inseminator

This certainly has to be a job that is by far the worst among the ones listed here. An artificial inseminator is someone who helps animals bear young without really having to go through all the trouble or pleasure (however you would like to put it). For example, an artificial inseminator has to almost put his entire arm into a cow’s you-know-where to get it all ready to have the next batch of calves.

Now, let me ask you one question: Is your job really that bad?

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