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I think it’s all about marketing yourself in a way your potential employer wants to have as part of their community.

Work places are communities just like anywhere people spend time in other people’s company. It’s also a false community in that most members of these communities would chose to spend time in the company they do.

It’s important to realise that a job interview is a gateway to a community’s established boundaries. They want to know they’re not letting “enemies” in. You have to reassure them you’ll be one of them, productively.

In the past, I’ve used Question 1 to illustrate how I’ll fit in productively to their community. I restrict my answer to 3 areas where I’ve put what they’re looking for to work, and what the results were.

To Question 2 I do the perplexed look (as you suggest) and responded with “I don’t think I’ve failed or been ashamed by anything I’ve done, but I do think there have been times when, on reflection, I could have done things differently. Such as… [and given examples that show how I'm always looking to improve, I take constructive feedback well, etc.].

As for the silent treatment. I’ve not experienced this since the ’80s when they were all the rage, especially here in the UK. If I did meet this kind of thing I usually knew I didn’t want to work there as it seemed theatrical and faddish. Sometimes I’d respond with something like: “Well, if you don’t have any more questions for me, perhaps I can ask: How do you feel your acquisition of XY has been proven a good thing for [name of employer's company]?

In the end, it all comes down to doing your research, knowing what you want from a job, and being confident in your own abilities.

Tom M. Southern

The key is to embody the concept that experts in their field have become so by making most of the mistakes their field has to offer. I also come across as incredibly candid, building the impression that I’ll always tell you as much as I can about exactly what’s going on and will take ownership of problems and their solutions.

This approach worked particularly well for me in my most recent job change (last month), as my new company is dealing with a lot of problems that I’ve already dealt with in the past. I’ve been able to display an instant understanding of where they are and represent access to one or several possible solutions, by being fully candid about the mistakes that I myself have made.

Deal-killer baby!